I think I've pissed myself

Hey, ya really bustin' ma balls here!

There are 57 posts tagged: "teh soschull notwerk"

Grandchildren endangered
20 June 2022

Following the murder of 13-year-old Olly Stephens in January last year, Marianna Spring examines the influence of social media in his death. From her investigations for the BBC's Panorama programme, it appears that F*c*book, Instagram, and Youtube did not moderate the display of inappropriate content to an underaged child's account, while TikTok and Snapchat did.

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Richard the Third
14 June 2022

There's been a lot of commentary following the outcome of the Johnny Depp/Amber Heard defamation trial. One of the highlights of the case, which has been the source of much hilarity and derision, was the revelation—although I'm pretty sure that it was publicly known years ago—of Heard taking a dump in the marital bed, and later trying to pass the blame onto one of the couple's lapdogs. She now lives in infamy as Amber Turd.

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Zits and tits
10 June 2022

YouTube has added a new category of videos to its home page, called Shorts. These are not only short, but vertically-framed, which makes me think that they were originally created for TikTok.

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Unreaction
30 May 2022

Reaction videos are the lamest and laziest form of YouTube content. This is not just a statement of opinion, but one of actual factual FACT! (oldman)

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Tweet in space
26 April 2022

After a period of broad speculation, Elon Musk will buy Twitter for a cool $44bn. The announcement has some of the Twitterati weeping into their soy lattes, if not actually soiling themselves.

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I chain, I sawed, I conquered
7 April 2022

I've a long-held passion for chainsaws. Oh yes, indeed. And I'm obviously not alone. This video, from Triple L Rustic Designs, has received 12 million views in a month! Yet they only have 276K subscribers. Wow! Who'd've figured? (shock)

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Stormy weather
6 April 2022

If ten hours of fireplace crackling is too hot for you, you might appreciate twenty-four hours of non-stop heavy rain action. And who wouldn't?

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Fire safety
21 March 2022

The ten-hour video shown in this thumbnail is actually ten hours and 31 seconds long. Presumably, the extra half a minute is for the paid sponsorship. (thinking)

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Of gods and dwarves
2 March 2022

So, there's a great deal of bitchin', back-and-forth on social media, over Amazon's reimagining of Lord of the Rings. It's kinda funny, watching grown men and women, but mainly *cough* men, get so animated about the arcane details in stories of elves and dwarves. Hey-ho, if it floats their boats, at least it's harmless.

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Skating on thin ice
8 February 2022

Wahey! Weibo's nationalistic shitheads are at it again. The it being brutally castigating their Olympians' performances, when failing to excel at things that they—the nationalistic shitheads, that is—wouldn't have a hope in hell of achieving in the first place. In particular, figure skater Zhu Yi, who fell a lot, leaving Team China out of the medals.

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Check your privilege
31 January 2022

Another example of Richard Meyer's voice-acting skills. This time, an opinionated Twitter weirdo making demands from people who, hopefully, don't give a shit about her expectations.

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Peachy
21 January 2022

Counting down his choice of The Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2021, Todd in the Shadows muses on the banality of Justin Bieber's Peaches, ft. Daniel Caesar and Giveon.

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Standing in the shadows
16 January 2022

Todd in the Shadows is a popular music critic. His chart retrospectives are based on the Billboard Hot 100 year-end lists, but most of the entries are familiar even to me, having grown up in England.

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Bombing under the radar
10 January 2022

The 355 has bombed at the US box office. The usual suspects claim that it's because this all women-led spy caper is part of an unimaginative progressive movement that audiences are tiring of. There may be something to that argument, but are they merely trying to fit things to their own cultural narrative?

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Film noir (et blanc)
4 January 2022

The First of the Few, AKA Spitfire, is a 1942 propaganda docudrama starring Leslie Howard and David Niven, recounting R.J. Mitchell's development of the Supermarine Spitfire. It's a little too jolly hockey sticks and derring-do to not be cringeworthy today.

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Too close to the sun
2 January 2022

I'm not sure whether to file this under comedic genius, or intellectual tragedy.

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Sally Ann Howes: no longer banging
22 December 2021

On the death of Sally Ann Howes, star of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, her son, the artist Andrew Hart Adler announced her loss on his Instagram account:

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RT: all is not what it seems
17 December 2021

There seems to be some confusion, at least among commentators on social media, as to what the Rotten Tomatoes audience score means. Take, for instance, YellowFlash discussing the 99% score for Spider-Man: No Way Home.

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Gagging order
17 December 2021

Russia's authorities like to throw their weight around. One of the ways that they do this, on the internet, is by demanding the removal of social media content that they deem to be illegal. Their definition of illegal, though, extends to content that is simply critical of them, or supportive of the opposition. Who could've possibly guessed? (thinking)

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Ageing disgracefully
6 December 2021

At 63, Madonna is keen to show the world that she still has it. Whatever it is, and whether or not the world wants to know.

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Too soon to hope
2 December 2021

Jack Dorsey, CEO and co-founder of Twitter, is stepping down. Or should that be stepping up, since he's leaving the gutter?

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Social media (bath) bombing
23 November 2021

Lush, producer of overpriced and overhyped cosmetics and personal care products, has announced that it will deactivate some of its social media accounts, until platforms take steps to provide a safer environment for users. The platforms of concern are Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and TikTok. (fist) (geddit?)

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Privacy is very important to F*c*book
19 November 2021

F*c*book has admonished the LAPD for breaching its T&C, by establishing fake profiles to surveil users suspected of criminal activity.

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All-we-can-afford-for-you-to-eat
18 November 2021

An all-you-can-eat buffet in Changsha, China, has banned a food live-streamer for eating all that he can eat. The owner of the Handadi Seafood BBQ Buffet stated that Mr Kang was losing him money every time he visited.

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Fighter talk
11 November 2021

YouTube channel Military TV posted a completely pointless and contentious list, of The 10 Deadliest Planes of WWII. They confuse things somewhat, by adding WW 2 Fighter Planes to the end of the video's title, but we'll come back to that later.

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Hello hardly anyone
4 October 2021

F*c*book and its subsidiaries, WhatsApp and Instagram, have been hit by a severe, global outage. In response, Twitter tweeted, in fun:

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Persona grating
29 September 2021

Just another of those sticking it here for my amusement posts.

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Herbidacious
20 September 2021

I wonder if she's the same simona.su@3sgroupcn.com who's a sales representative for 3S Group. Both 3sgroupcn.com and 3sgruopcn.com are registered domains, but only the former has a website, and it purports to sell water pumps. (thinking)

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Dial 'M' for monotonous
26 August 2021

YouTube's random algorithm has thrown up the promotional video for M's Pop Music at me, several times in the last couple of weeks. I really didn't like that song back in 1979, and the forty-odd intervening years have done nothing to improve my opinion of it.

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Comics for dummies
24 August 2021

Richard Meyer is an independent comic book writer, or artist, or both. Something like that. He has a YouTube channel in which he talks about comics. I don't know why YouTube throws this shit up at me, but it does.

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To chirp, or not to Chirp
17 August 2021

A recent interface redesign has left Twitter users complaining of headaches and discomfort. The illegibility of a newly-designed typeface, Chirp, hasn't helped those with impaired vision.

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Iron Giant is bestester
6 August 2021

Internet dweebs have mocked the BBC, after a tweet by BBC Sport from the Tokyo Olympics confused a Gundam statue with a Transformer.

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Sore losers
3 August 2021

It appears that Weibo's nationalist shitheads don't take kindly to China's Olympic athletes unpatriotically losing out on gold. From behind their keyboards and keypads, they fulminate and humiliate their fellow countrymen and -women for failing at something that they could never achieve themselves. And the athletes, like dumfux, accept it.

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Mushrooms are tasty
28 July 2021

Ina Garten (who?) is the Barefoot Contessa (who?). At least, I think she is.

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Can I have a 'please, no more emojis' emoji?
25 July 2021

It appears that the BBC considers the creation of emojis to be of such importance that they assigned not one, but two of their crack business reporters to the task of writing an article on emojis that don't exist. Yet.

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Virtual schmoozing
23 July 2021

Mark Zuckerberg has announced his vision for Facebook to transition to a metaverse company.

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Man at the top
12 July 2021

Interviewed by Amol Rajan on behalf of the BBC, Sundar Pichai, CEO of Google and its parent company, Alphabet, claims that the free and open internet is under attack.

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Is there a dietician in the house?
16 June 2021

A couple of idiots on YouTube, claiming to be dietician nutritionists, and spreading misinformation. Who knew? I couldn't watch the whole video, because their voices grated on my nerves.

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Is there a doctor in the house?
10 June 2021

Ooooh, I've found another crackpot on YouTube. Aren't I lucky?

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My mum's newspaper, as an audiobook
27 May 2021

YouTube's algorithm is broken. Again. Or possibly it's because I can't set preferences, since I'm not signed into an account that I don't have. Whatever, the borg keeps bringing up The Podcast Of The Lotus Eaters and, worse, Alex Bellend Belfield, the self-styled voices in his head voice of reason in my recommended videos. For the love of the children, why?

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Ghostbusted
8 April 2021

That irrepressible bonehead, Jeremy Hambly at TheQuartering, unfavourably compares the upcoming Ghostbusters: Afterlife with the original Ghostbusters (1984). He notes that the ghosts aren't scary, unlike those in the original, which he describes as a horror film:

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Debunking disliking dislikes
6 April 2021

In No More Dislikes For You, Just Some Guy raises more valid points on YouTube's experiment. This is a useful insight to those of us who are not YouTube content creators.

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Disliking dislikes
1 April 2021

For undisclosed reasons—read: pressure from Disney/LucasFilm—YouTube is experimenting with hiding dislike counts.

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Justice is served!
17 March 2021

Zac Snyder's version of Justice League is finally upon us, with most critics agreeing that it's an improvement on the 2017 original, at least according to those reviews cited by the BBC. The original was infamously fucked up, sorry, reimagined by Joss Whedon, when he took over the production after Snyder's departure following a family tragedy. I have watched that version, described by one anonymous Warner Bros executive as a piece of shit. It was…okay, but let down by a muddled plot and an anticlimactic antagonist.

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Breaking the rules
2 March 2021

As I mentioned long ago, it's thanks to my perfectly-fitted tinfoil hat that I'm not part of the social network. I don't do F*c*book; Twitter; Instagram, or any of that other stuff. At one point, I did have a hardly-used, one careful owner YouTube account, but I bailed out when Google did a Monica Lewinsky, and came a'gobblin'.

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'I' for information, not intelligent
9 February 2021

As more of our lives go online, companies and governments are turning to automated methods to keep things in check—face recognition, profiling, personal data acquisition; all very Orwellian. I don't know what's more worrying, the consequences of it working, or the consequences when it doesn't work as expected or intended.

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Taking a fall
8 August 2020

I'd not heard of Jerry Falwell Jr., the president of Liberty University, a US evangelical Christian college, until he stepped down from his position following an unfortunate social media faux pas. His misdemeanour seems pretty innocent, at least to me, but the righteously indignant took to social media nevertheless.

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What a fool believes
2 August 2020

Elon Musk, a man who believes in life out there (points at the stars), may have embarrassed himself on Twitter by musing on the extraterrestrial origin of the pyramids. Egypt's Minister of International Co-operation, Rania al-Mashat, and Egyptian archeologist Zahi Hawass have refuted his statement—but they would, wouldn't they?—although I thought that al-Mashat's response was unnecessarily deferential to the space cadet.

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Bustameme
25 July 2020

Memes. You either understand them, or you don't. And, for a time, for those that didn't, there was Behind The Meme, a YouTube channel demystifying memes for the uninitiated. The channel's still there, it just hasn't been updated in a long while.

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Q: When is an SJW not an SJW?
25 July 2020

A: When they're virtual signalling.

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Closing the gender gap
16 July 2020

Another day, another hashtag movement. And this one concerns US police brutality. Just for a change.

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Yanking chains
17 June 2020

I seem to have fallen into a pit of irrelevance on YouTube.

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Influencers
11 May 2020

Social media influencers. Some people love 'em; others think that they're pointless, vacuous droids that do nothing creative and add nothing of value. I know on which side of the divide I stand.

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Lies, damned lies, and the other one
29 August 2013

An article on Adrants, pithily entitled This is How Facebook is Going to Die, claims that Facebook's demise will result as teenagers flock to other social networks to avoid their parents. In support of his hypothesis, Steve Hall states:

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Savile row
16 November 2012

During investigations into child abuse at Welsh children's homes, one victim implicated a high-ranking Conservative Party official in a recent Newsnight broadcast. Apparently the individual wasn't named during the programme, but later Twitter chatter wrongly named former party treasurer Lord McAlpine.

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Twitter: is this the end of the road?
2 August 2012

The BBC reports that Helen Skelton has closed her Twitter account, because she cannot cope with negative comments. How many will follow her and abandon the sinking ship?

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Facebook
1 March 2009

I received an invite from someone who I'd briefly exchanged emails with about two years ago, asking me to be their friend on Facebook. And all I'd have to do is join first.

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