Will this madness never end?

The southern part of Erica

Serious shit's going down in Nigeria, but it may all be to my advantage. I'm quite the lucky boy!

Mrs.Inga-Britt Ahleniu<info20885@gmail.com> [sic] contacts me, on behalf of the UN Office of International Oversight Services, concerning compensation of 10.5M somethings. I'm not sure whether or not this is really great news though.

I mean, £10.5M, €10.5M, or $10.5M would be nice. But I don't think I'd bother paying a fee of $160 just for 10.5M﷼; it's simply not worth the hassle for only $90.* And if BoJo's government's involved, then shenanigans are to be expected. (pipe)

The scam activities to which Mrs Ahleniu(s) refers are of such magnitude and consequence that the Antarctic and South Erican security agencies have complained. I have to admit my ignorance of Antarctica actually having a security agency, so at least I've learned something.

But even I realise that things are pretty serious when the South Ericans get involved! (eek)

UNITED NATIONS OFFICE OF INTERNATIONAL OVERSIGHT SERVICES Internal Audit,Monitoring,Consulting And Investigations Division Attention: Sir/Madam, This is to inform you that I came to Nigeria yesterday from London, after series of complains from the FBI and other Security agencies from Asia, Europe, Oceania, Antarctica, South Erica and the United States of America respectively, against the Federal Government of Nigeria and the British Government for he rate of scam activities going on in these two nations. I have met with President Muhammadu Buhari of Nigeria who claimed that he has been trying his best to make sure you receive your fund in your account. Right now, as directed by our secretary general Mr. António Guterres, We are working in collaborations with the Nigerian Economic and Financial Crime Commission (EFCC) and have decided to waive away all your clearance fees/Charges and authorize the Government of Nigeria to effect the payment of your compensation of an amount of 10.5M approved by both the British government and the UN into your account without any delay. The only fee you will pay to confirm your fund in your account is your Notarization fee which will cost you only but 160 united state dollars, to the UN. Sincerely, you are a lucky person because I have just discovered that some top Nigerian and British Government Officials are interested in your fund and they are working in collaboration with One Mr. Richard Graves from USA to frustrate you and thereafter divert your fund into their personal account. I have a very limited time to stay in Nigeria here so I would like you to urgently respond to this message so that I can advise you on how best to confirm your fund in your account within the next 72 hours. For oral discussion, call me on this number which I just acquired in Nigeria today +2347016182920. Sincerely yours, Mrs.Inga-Britt Ahlenius. Contact ( www.unofficeorg0@aol.com ) Also contact our secretary general Mr. António Guterres, for more investigation. Name: Mr. António Guterres E-mail: ( www.unofficeorg0@aol.com ). Call me +1 (662) 532-2015

While Inga-Britt Ahlenius did serve as Under-Secretary-General for the United Nations Office of Internal Oversight Services, she left the role in 2010. Clearly, she hasn't updated her LinkedIn profile, which is presumably where our intrepid correspondent got their information. Mind you, she's now 82 years old, so she probably doesn't gave a crap about LinkedIn.

The OIOS's current Under-Secretary-General is Fatoumata Ndiaye.

* Iranian rial. Currently, $1=42000﷼. So 10.5M﷼ comes to, a frankly uninspiring, $250.