Make love, not football

18.05.2020 21:05 UTC+02:00
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Football stadium sparsely populated by mannequins — FC Seoul has its spirits lifted by gasps from enthralled mannequins, so lifelike that they're required to wear Chongmasks and observe social distancing requirements. (mask)

During the COVID-19 lockdown, football clubs are playing their matches to empty stadia. The BBC asks if play can only resume in empty stadiums, how can the atmosphere be improved?

FC Seoul has apologised after its stands were populated with ~~sex dolls~~ premium mannequins, procured from a manufacturer of sex toys.

I consider myself largely ignorant of football stadium atmosphere, but my understanding is that it has as much to do with the noise of the crowd as the crowd itself. I can't help but think that any gasps emitted by sex dolls would lend an entirely different atmosphere to the match.