Surgical bypass
Michael Johnson asks me to kindly agree for
Austin Publications' proposal, without clarity as to what it is that they expect—other than money—or what makes this edition special. Commonly, a special edition of a journal has a specific theme; at least that's the case for traditional, academically-relevant journals, it may be different for webcomics with their lower bar for acceptance. All that I know of the special edition of Austin Journal of Surgery is that it's due to be shat out onto the interwebz next month.
Minimum article processing charges will be applied, although DOI charges will still be levied. But he doesn't indicate what these will be. I think that, for budgetary purposes, I need this information before I can commit to submitting my work to this auspicious volume of shit.
Date: Sat, 29 Oct 2022 01:05:44 +0000 Subject: Kindly Agree for our Proposal From: Michael Johnson <michael.johnson@austinsjurnls.co> Reply-To: Michael Johnson <michaeljohnson@austinjurnals.co>
Respected Dr. [NAME], Greetings for the day! Hope you are doing well. We are in search of articles for the successful release of Special Edition of Austin Journal of Surgery in November 2022. Is it possible for you to support us with your Research or mini review for this issue? We are confident that you are always will be there to support us. Minimum Article Processing Charges will be charged for the manuscripts, which are submitted on or before November 10, 2022. (DOI Charges applicable). The journal is in volume 9. Articles Acceptance rate 78%. We provide DOI number for every article after publication. The current Impact Factor for the journal is 2.8 Await your positive response. Regards, Michael Johnson Editorial Office: Austin Journal of Surgery (ISSN 2381-9030) Austin Publications
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Dear Michael Johnson, Thank you for your invitation to submit my work to this auspicious special edition of Austin Journal of Surgery. You note that minimum article processing charges as well as DOI charges will be applicable. But I need to know what these charges will be, for budgetary purposes. Sincerely,
Bloody hell! $599, or $399 for FOMO? Nice work if you can get it. Unfortunately for Michael, this time he doesn't.
I would charge less than that for a full surgical proceedure. Although, in fairness, the patient would be unlikely to pull through.
Date: Sat, 29 Oct 2022 17:16:50 +0000 From: michaeljohnson@austinjurnals.co Subject: Re: Waiting for your Reply
Thank you for your response. We charge USD 599 only for DOI number and other maintenance charges. If you send your work on or before October 31, 2022 then we charge USD 399 only. Please send your article as an attachment to this mail id as soon as possible. We look forward to hear from you. Regards, Michael Johnson
Date: Mon, 31 Oct 2022 09:00:21 +0000 From: michaeljohnson@austinjurnals.co Subject: Re: Waiting for your Reply
We are waiting for your reply. Please let me know how much you are able to pay the fee for publication of your article? Regards, Michael Johnson
I'm not sure if the fees are negotiable, since Michael now asks me how much I'm able to pay, not if I'm able or willing to pay. A smart man would take my reply as an indication to call it quits. I wonder how smart Michael is. (thinking)
Dear Michael Johnson I could perform a minor surgery for US$399, and for US$599 the patient might have a chance of survival. I think we'll use our funding more selectively. Thank you. Sincerely,
If the question is are the fees negotiable?
, the answer appears to be yes
.
If the question is how smart is Michael?
, the answer appears to be not very
. (SMH)
And the miserable bastard didn't even acknowledge my little joke. Hrmph!
Further correspondence is unnecessary: I'm not a surgeon; I don't have any surgery papers to be published; and, even if I did, I wouldn't pay to publish in Austin Journal of Surgery. After all, $100 is still $100, and I'd rather it benefitted me than Austin Publishing.
Date: Mon, 31 Oct 2022 10:32:02 +0000 From: michaeljohnson@austinjurnals.co Subject: Re: Waiting for your Reply
We understand your concern but we charge for our journal maintenance only. Finally we are willing to publish your work, so please send your article as an attachment to this mail id as soon as possible. We charge USD 100 only for you. We look forward to hear from you. Regards, Michael Johnson