All's not what it seems

They'll kill me if they find out I talked

There are 13 posts tagged: boy, that escalated quickly!

Reaction farce
11 March 2024

Haiti is descending into anarchy. As the country's unelected prime minister is away raising foreign support for military intervention, gangs have taken over the capital and effectively the airport, preventing his return.

Their aim is true (although their methods aren't)
8 March 2024

After slaughtering hundreds of innocent starving Palestinians who rushed a relief convoy, the IDF claims that it fired at suspects, not at aid trucks.

How not to win friends and influence people
9 February 2024

An axe- and knife-wielding Iranian asylum-seeker, who took fifteen passengers and a train driver hostage, was shot dead when Swiss police stormed the train and he attacked them. All hostages were released unharmed.

Love thy neighbour
10 May 2023

A yee-haw in Louisiana shot at children running away from his home, unknowingly hitting a young teenaged girl in the back of the head. It's not clear what part of firing at shadows makes a hit unknowing; pure luck that the shot found its mark, perhaps? It makes it sound like he didn't intend to hit anyone; in which case, not firing into the shadows in the first place would've been a better approach. And people like this are allowed to own firearms in the USofA(rmaments).

Blaze of inglory
19 April 2023

If you go down in the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise If you go down in the woods today, you'd better go in disguise

73 and counting
18 February 2023

A BBC News report of a gunman killing six people in Arkabutla, MS, a community of fewer than 300 294 people, is remarkable only for the accompanying statistic: this is the 73rd mass shooting in the USA this year. And we haven't even said goodbye to February.

Military cocktail
13 November 2022

Following his takeover of Twitter, the space cadet announced paid-for account verification. The blue check brigade lost its collective shit—it's a thing that losers on Twitter are wont to do. But it didn't take others too long to seize the opportunity for some major-league trolling.

Too obvious?
19 July 2022

Yet another gunman attacks innocent US civilians, this time killing three people in Greenwood, IN. It wouldn't have made anything other than local news, but for the fact that he was stopped dead in his tracks—quite literally—by a fellow gunslinger packing his own heater. Elisjsha Dicken dropped the attacker, Jonathan Sapirman—who had two rifles, a handgun, and over 100 rounds of ammunition—only two minutes into his assault.

Chicken, egg; egg, chicken
28 May 2022

Dennis Butler was warned to slow down while passing a celebratory event in Charleston, WV, because children were playing there. When the convicted felon returned to fire on the crowd with a semi-automatic rifle, a bystander drew her own gun and popped a cap in his ass, killing him and saving innocent lives. Bloody good show, lady!

The popcorn bandit (popcorn)
2 March 2022

Two separate couples visited a suburban cinema in Tampa, FL, on 13th January 2014. As the feature started, one of the husbands ignored the request to turn off mobile devices. The other admonished him. Insults were traded; popcorn was thrown; shots were fired.

Trigger happy
11 July 2021

Attackers stormed the domestic home of Haiti's president, Jovenel Moïse, assassinating him in what can only have been a moment of overzealousness. For that was not the intent, apparently.

Limited parking available
18 May 2015

Rival biker gangs in Waco, Texas, got into an argument over parking spaces outside a restaurant. Of all things.

Off with his head!
8 July 2013

A referee at a provincial amateur football match in northern Brazil showed one of the players the red card, sending him off. The player refused to leave, so the referee showed him his knife…and then fatally stabbed him with it. That's one way of dealing with recalcitrant players, I guess.