Plastic fantastic
A worldwide singing and acting sensation for over 50 years, Cher was finally recognised by the Kennedy Center Honors last year. It's amazing that they were able to recognise her at all, after all that surgery…BA-DUM-TSCH!
Thank you! I'm here all week, try the beef.
Back in the '90s, a friend of mine who was a car mechanic and Cher fan—and I'm not for a moment suggesting that the two are synonymous, just coincidental in this case—owned a Vauxhall Astra which needed a new exhaust. He had bought a replacement, and hid it under the passenger's seat until he could work on it in the morning. He left the car parked kerbside overnight. When he returned the next day, he found that some socially-maladjusted individual had broken into his car and stolen the new exhaust. How the hell did they know it was there? (confused)
Anyhow, I'm not sure whether he was more upset that they'd stolen his new exhaust, or that they'd left behind his collection of Cher tapes! Personally, I couldn't help but think that, socially-maladjusted though they might be, at least they had good taste in music.
Well done, Cher, for keeping going this long; what a trouper! You deserve a good, long rest. And you're not the only one…I bloody hate If I Could Turn Back Time, and I'm afraid that the shitstain that it's left on my memory will never really go away.
For those of you who've never heard of the Kennedy Center Honors: Throughout its 40-year history, the Kennedy Center Honors has redefined America's perception of its artistic legacy and reinvented the way this nation rewards its artists.
To this end, it has upheld a tradition of recognizing the lifelong accomplishments and extraordinary talents of our nations' [sic, my emphasis] most-prestigious artists
.
Since the turn of the century, the American artists so recognised have included: Angela Lansbury, Plácido Domingo, and Mikhail Baryshnikov (2000); Julie Andrews and Luciano Pavarotti (2001); Itzhak Perlman (2003); Joan Sutherland and Elton John (2004); Andrew Lloyd Webber and Zubin Mehta (2006); Pete Townshend and Roger Daltrey of The Who (2008); Paul McCartney (2010); Led Zeppelin (2012); Carlos Santana (2013); and Sting (2014). Huh? Is this cultural appropriation?
But, as Bill Cosby (1998) discovered in 2018, what the Kennedy Center Honors giveth, the Kennedy Center Honors can taketh away. Here endeth the lesson.