The bubble tea bubble

• 06.02.2024 09:57 UTC+01:00
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Writing for BBC Worklife, Aysha Imtiaz seeks to explain Why the UK bubble tea market is 'special'. Except she doesn't really substantiate her premiss that it's special in the first place.

According to Kristin McCoy-Ward—a bubble tea influencer FFS! (SMH)—The UK bubble tea market is special, because the people… have made it their own, which in and of itself only serves to underline the vacuity of influencers. Imtiaz herself alludes to the British twist on the beverages.

But nowhere does she explain what that twist is, or what the British have done to make sweetened, artificially-flavoured tea with tapioca pearls their own. Besides the market territory—which, as far as national claims to uniqueness go, is pretty lame—there seems to be nothing that differentiates British bubble tea from what's available elsewhere. Perhaps Imtiaz omitted the critical information as an oversight; or perhaps, just perhaps, the quotation marks in the title are significant in this regard. (shrug)

Personally, I prefer my tea less fucked up. Ideally, zero fucked up.

Just think of the turtles (turtle)

Beyond not really substantiating her claim that the UK bubble tea market stands out remarkably from others, Imtiaz doesn't address a conundrum that occurred to me. And that is the implications for the prevalence of one-shot plastics.

By her own account, bubble tea is a grab-and-go beverage, which means disposable plastic cups and, generally, straws. The beverage is also highly popular among Gen Z consumers. Yet zoomers are supposedly among the most concerned about the environmental impact of disposable plastics. (dolphin)

I guess that, as long as Greta Thunberg doesn't find out, there's no need to worry. (okay)