O-bi
Disney continues to strip mine its IP to generate content for, and interest in, its streaming channel, Disney+. Following on from its previous Star Wars offshoots, The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett, comes Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Realising that the snowflakes simply cannot accept anything that doesn't reflect themselves on-screen, Disney has planned a stunning and brave revelation: Obi chose his own name, and he chose it to reflect his sexual orientation. It's pronounced /ˈoʊ.baɪ/ (o·bi
), not /ˈoʊ.biː/ (o·be
). He bats for both sides, but he prefers the penis to the pussy.(prick)
Meanwhile, rumours of Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen preparing for a red-hot snogging scene between Kenobi and Darth Vader, with Vader turning to the Dark Side after their relationship soured, have only just occurred to me.
Remember, kids, you read it here first. All the culture news that's fit to fake.
Hmmm…Darth Gayder. (thinking)…(devil)